Book Summary Preview : How Full Is Your Bucket

The Big Idea

In this brief, yet very insightful book, the authors, a grandfather-grandson team, reveal how even the briefest of interactions can affect your relationships, productivity, and health. Based on a simple metaphor of a dipper and a bucket, and grounded in 50 years of comprehensive psychological and work-place research, How Full Is Your Bucket? will show you how to greatly increase the positive moments in your life, on the one hand, and reduce the negative, on the other hand. Moreover, you will read here practical advices and the authors’ very own “Five Strategies for Increasing Positive Emotions” which are easy to apply and which will surely change the way you look at your life, your work, and your world.

Powerful, captivating, and easy to read, this book’s heartwarming message has a spiritual quality to it. It manages to be inspirational without being preachy. Indeed, this book is a must read for anyone desiring to improve their work life and organizations, strengthen their relationships, and live happier.

Negativity Kills

In a study of one of the most extreme and perversely effective cases of psychological warfare on record, Dr. William E. Mayer, former Chief Psychiatrist of the U.S. Army, set out to discover the reason why so many men died in the North Korean POW camps during the Korean War. He was particularly interested in finding out why despite the relatively minimal physical torture that American POWs were subjected to, the overall death rate at these camps was at a ghastly 38% -- the highest POW death rate in U.S. military history!

In the course of his study, Mayer discovered that half of those soldiers died because they had completely given up, both mentally and physically. Among his findings, he reported that the North Koreans totally denied their captives the emotional support that comes from interpersonal relationships. Their intent was to break whatever bond these men had and turn them against each other. Mayer also said that the North Koreans subjected the soldiers into a kind of “emotional and psychological isolation,” which resulted in the men experiencing an intense feeling of hopelessness. This experience drove many of these soldiers to go into a corner, sit down, pull a blanket over their heads, and simply die.

This story is just one of the powerful illustrations of the devastating effects of negative emotions. In fact, recent studies show that negative emotions can be bad to your health and can shorten your life. In contrast, however, similar studies also show that positive emotions can improve your physical and mental health and act as a buffer against depression and a host of illnesses.   

Studying Positivity: The Emergence of Positive Psychology

Don Clifton realized in the early 1950s that the field of psychology was based almost entirely on the study of what is wrong with people. He considered this to be a significant stumbling block in this field, and so he began to wonder if it would be more important to study what is right with people.

Together with his colleagues, he set out to find the answers to his questions. Early in his research, he discovered that people’s lives are shaped by their interactions with others and that these encounters have a profound effect on people. In addition, these encounters were rarely, if ever, neutral; that is, they either had a positive or negative effect on people.

To make a long story short, his efforts and pioneering study resulted in the birth of Positive Psychology, a field of study that focuses on what is right with people and on the effects of positive emotions. In 2002, the American Psychological Association honored his work and cited him as the Grandfather of Positive Psychology and the Father of Strengths Psychology. 

Unfortunately, that same year, he was diagnosed with a life-threatening cancer. Knowing that his time was limited, Don spent his final months doing what he did best and what people who knew him well expected of him: helping others to focus on the positive.

At that time, Don had already written several books on this topic, however, he set out to write, together with his grandson Tom Rath, one last book based on the “Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket” that he developed in the 1960s, and which he knew would make a big difference in people’s lives. Even though he was undergoing treatment and was quite weakened by it, Don was able to continue working on the book with Tom, who incidentally is also waging his own battle against cancer. In September of 2003, Don passed away, but not before he and Tom finished the first draft of the book.

Looking back, Tom realized that working on the book energized Don, as much as it did him, in the final stages of his fight with cancer. Likewise, applying his grandfather’s theory has helped him cope with his disease and gave him the needed strength and energy to stay ahead of this disease. Indeed, this collaborative work is their testament to the wonders of positive emotions and their unwavering belief in the value of caring and compassionate relationships. 
 

The Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket

The story about those American POWs motivated Don Clifton and his colleagues to study the flip side of that story. They wondered if continuous positive reinforcement could uplift and motivate people to reach for greater heights. In essence, they asked themselves whether positivity has an even stronger impact on people than negativity. Their research into this topic is the inspiration behind the Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket.

Based on a simple metaphor of a “dipper” and a “bucket,” this theory states that:

• Everyone has an invisible bucket. It is constantly emptied or filled depending on what others say or do to other people. Hence, people are at their best when their buckets are overflowing and at their worst when their buckets are empty.
• Everyone also has an invisible dipper. In each and every interaction, people use their dipper to either fill up or dip from other’s buckets.
• Whenever people choose to fill other people’s buckets, they in turn fill their own. And whenever people do the opposite, they only diminish themselves.

So like the “cup that runneth over,” a full bucket energizes you and makes you see the world in a positive light. This in turn will greatly enhance your relationships, health, productivity, and happiness. However, an empty bucket will poison your outlook, sap your energy, and undermine your will. Thus, whenever someone dips from your bucket, you get hurt.

Bucket Filling

People experience hundreds of potentially life-turning points in a given day, but usually the impact of these encounters is left unnoticed. Of course, only a few of these moments are so profound as to make people stop and contemplate on those events.

But just because many of these interactions are commonplace and are often unremarkable does not necessarily mean that they do not matter. Even if you should focus more on how to increase the positive emotions in your life, you should never disregard negativity and weaknesses. Definitely, positivity must be grounded in reality.

But in any event, you should not let hardships and adversities to define you. By and large, it is your responses to difficult events and your emotional state that are much more important. So, make a habit of filling buckets. Not only will bucket filling shield you against negativity, it will also allow you to survive and grow in the face of adversities.

Physical and Mental Health Effects

Positive emotions and reinforcements can improve mental and physical well-being. For instance, optimists have been found to have more T4 or “helper” cells that fight against infection. Furthermore, they average to less than one doctor visit per year, while pessimists average to more than 3.5 visits per year. 

Moreover, thousands of studies have shown that positive emotions could indeed lengthen one’s life. Take the case of the study of 839 Mayo Clinic patients over a 30-year period that found a link between optimism and a lower risk of early death. Even more surprising is the landmark study of 180 elderly Catholic nuns that showed a correlation between positive emotions and lower mortality rates among these women.

 

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